IronMaiden80
Member
Hi Mummies,
I am a FTWM who just returned to work this week. I have a toddler and a 4-month old baby at home and I engaged a helper to take care of my children with my mil. Previously mil had some issues with her but all have been resolved. Now it is my turn.
I haven't been able to spend time with my baby as my helper keeps hogging on to him. Previously during my maternity leave, my helper couldn't manage the baby as he was constantly crying with her so I asked her to spend more time with the baby as she is already familiar with the toddler. Now all she wants to do is to carry / spend time with the baby and not help out with the toddler or any housework. I have spoken to her once but she broke down before I could even complete what I wanted to say to her. She can sit down by the bouncer and watch my baby sleep while I am busy with the toddler / doing housework. When I asked her to help out, she gets upset and its shown all over her face. Last night I asked her to watch over the toddler and I told her I would like to carry the baby, she refused to hand him over. Giving her the benefit of doubt that she might not have heard me, I repeated myself and stretched my hands out. She reluctantly handed the baby over but from the reflection from my kitchen window, I could see her watching me... I felt really uncomfortable and turned to look at her and she pretended to look away. Just when I was walking away, she asked me to put the baby on his bouncer. I was very shocked but I kept quiet. She also likes to kiss my baby excessively near his mouth... it makes me very uncomfortable and I have highlighted to her but she is still doing it.
Should I talk to her one last time or have her sent home? I really do not like to deal with this kind of stuff as I rather spend my time with my kids but I feel she has gone overboard. I feel like I am the helper and she is the mother of my child.
Appreciate your thoughts and advice.
I am a FTWM who just returned to work this week. I have a toddler and a 4-month old baby at home and I engaged a helper to take care of my children with my mil. Previously mil had some issues with her but all have been resolved. Now it is my turn.
I haven't been able to spend time with my baby as my helper keeps hogging on to him. Previously during my maternity leave, my helper couldn't manage the baby as he was constantly crying with her so I asked her to spend more time with the baby as she is already familiar with the toddler. Now all she wants to do is to carry / spend time with the baby and not help out with the toddler or any housework. I have spoken to her once but she broke down before I could even complete what I wanted to say to her. She can sit down by the bouncer and watch my baby sleep while I am busy with the toddler / doing housework. When I asked her to help out, she gets upset and its shown all over her face. Last night I asked her to watch over the toddler and I told her I would like to carry the baby, she refused to hand him over. Giving her the benefit of doubt that she might not have heard me, I repeated myself and stretched my hands out. She reluctantly handed the baby over but from the reflection from my kitchen window, I could see her watching me... I felt really uncomfortable and turned to look at her and she pretended to look away. Just when I was walking away, she asked me to put the baby on his bouncer. I was very shocked but I kept quiet. She also likes to kiss my baby excessively near his mouth... it makes me very uncomfortable and I have highlighted to her but she is still doing it.
Should I talk to her one last time or have her sent home? I really do not like to deal with this kind of stuff as I rather spend my time with my kids but I feel she has gone overboard. I feel like I am the helper and she is the mother of my child.
Appreciate your thoughts and advice.