Divorce Mummy

SammieZh
fake complete family! Exactly what I thought too.. why so pretentious? Im pretending now in front of mt kids but deep down, im crying and screaming for help.
 


Strongmummy82

Depends on wat hubby u hav in the past.. My was a control king.. Always is guys first even I visit my parents need ask his permission.. Control freak right.. Now I can do anything I want wear anything I want.. Totally free with my 2 little darlings.. Smt my parents help me look after my kids n I can even enjoy a nights out with my gf..

It does not necessary mean got a new bf.. For me kind off scare of commitment now.. When ppl say love me.. I don believe in it anymore
 
Sammiezh

Yup single mum is not a crime.. Having a fake hubby is worst.. Juz 1 more kid to look after 1 more ppl chores to do.. might as well kick them out of our live n we got lesser troubles n more time for ourselves n our little love ones..
 
thanks for the input, mummies. can I know any of you staying with your little ones only? I'm currently staying with my 2 yr old daughter but sometimes really feel so drained. My parents are staying on their own and always welcome me to stay with them if I cannot cope. They are also extremely happy when I leave my girl with them while I stay on my own at my own place. Honestly speaking, I can't really copy on my own that well but I don't want to live with them as well. I want to be on my own with my girl. I want to bring my girl up on my own, do everything on my own.. but feel that my will is very weak. I have lots of support from my parents but I just want to be independent at the same time. Anyone in the same situation as me? Or understand what I am feeling?
 
Strongmummy82

I get what u mean I m staying with my parents smt juz have diff ways of doing things with my parents. But its still good to have my kids close to my parents. I also thinking of moving out but afraid I can't cope with 2 kids. was thinking of weekdays with my parents than wknd on my own with kids.

Smt with a little help u will be less stress n have a bit time for urself its not being selfish but everyone need a break on things.

Do consider as smt wat we one is also too high for us to reach. I try b4 bringing up my kids alone when with my ex as he juz don't care n think its mum job not dad thats why div. Now with my parents help I feel better more relax. I juz make sure wknd is alone time for me n my kids. Wkday is with my parents help n I look after them afterwork. Chores wise I also do everything myself. Juz think of it in another way. Ur girl is still young age need lots of attention. Smt I also discuss with my parents on my kids how to teach them. As div will have affect on kids my parents also help to look out if my kids got anything unusual. Having another opinion on things is also better.
 
Thanks Jingli. Ur words have much wisdom. I think im too headstrong for my own good. And although I stay on my own with ex for not long.. I kind of cannot go back to my parents place. Not used to staying with other ppl in a way. Like to be queen and not deal with ppl. I think im weird. But really appreciate their help alot in helping me. So did u sell ur old place or your ex buy over?
 
strongmummy82

I sold my old place.. Do consider other opinion no need to hold on urself its not easy ur parents can be ur shoulder smt.
 
Hi mummies

Anyone got nice n gd lawyer to recommend? Need to reopen my custody case with my ex n my previous lawyer juz job hop n increasing fees which is too exp for me. Anyone can recommend?
 
Hi

I engage Rina from Kalco. She's realistic and reasonable. However if you need a lawyer who's very aggressive, she might not the correct one
 
Strongmummy82

I totally understand what you are going through. Like you I also want to be as independent as possible and didnt want to trouble anyone at all. You are luckier, my parents are divorced and both dont have a house of their own. So I have no choice but to be very independent and care for me 5 year old kid (who happens to be a special kid). Its really tough and sometimes you will feel like giving up. Let your parents help you whenever you need help..maybe leave your kid over at their place on fri and sat and you can have time of your own. Girl you must try to let go a little, dun put all the burden on your own shoulder.
We need to be happy in order for our kids to be happy too!
 
strongmummy82

Totally understand what you mean.

I am also someone who doesnt want to burden anyone including my own parents with my troubles. Being independent is good but sometimes we have to learn to let do and be dependent on our love ones. You might want to consider leaving your girl with your parents for 2 days in a week in order for you to have sometime on your own.
We need to be happy in order to raise happy kids, so when you cant cope and feels stress, your child can feel it too.
Girl, just carry 75% of the burden and leave the 25% to your parents.
 
Mimiyang
I had the same lawyer as you. I also feel she lacks the aggression for the job

Strongmummy82
Feel you cos I'm similar and wants to stand on my own.. But then it's difficult when I'm working and needs help with ferrying and seeing to their daily needs.. Parents are retired and more than happy to help? My dad, especially, is super close to my second son

Ultimately ask what's best for your child =)
 
hi there mummies.

im new here. i oso hv prob with my hb. i told him i wanted a divorce just last mth which he dun wan. i knew abt his affair when i was preg with #3 but i stood strong cos i wry i miscarriage.. only till nw den i mention..
 
Think about it I am still grateful with Rina, my lawyer. My ex colleague spent $35K with other lawyer. It triple the price compare to mine.
 
I have a few months old baby, relationship with my hub got worsen after having baby. I moved out of the house and now preparing for divorce. Just want to pour out. Why this happens... :(
 
I have a few months old baby, relationship with my hub got worsen after having baby. I moved out of the house and now preparing for divorce. Just want to pour out. Why this happens... :(

Hi really sorry to see this from u as I remember u thru your previous postings and it was so tough already.. I was also having issues with my marriage after the birth of my twins as I struggled with post natal blues.. it's definitely not easy but for the sake of your baby.. hopefully you and your hub can mend n strengthen the relationship. I must admit I m still not happy but it's definitely happier than the baby don't have a complete family if we do not try. Hard enough.

Blessings to you and bAby.
 
️thanks so much! I remember you! I think we conceived during the same period! It was really tough and especially not having supportive Husband. It was a turmoil for me and for the best for the baby, we just have to leave. How ironic... hope all is well at your side ! How are you coping with your twins?
 
I m a single mum of 3 kids. I been divorced for 3 yrs. sometimes, I asked myself if I didn't divorce , what would it be like for my 3 children n myself.

Then again, my ex had an affair with a maid in 2004. I forgave him . But he an another affair in 2014, even plotted to kill me over my insurance, my saving n the house. From then onwards , i move on, I like to advocate to my 3 daughters, we can be independent n we will survive. My ex didn't even give us a single cents of maint ( his annual income 103000 ). There loop hope in our law system where the businessman can maniple their earning it even u employ the most clever lawyer. The judges cannot do anything about it., I hold 2 jobs to support my kids too. Meaning, the law said I earn more money than my ex, no maint for me. So, life not fair n woman charter doesn't help much. ( I witnessed many ugly battles in courts, the judges do empathize us but the law need to be fair . N in our system, no fault with man in adultery, unlike China n US system)

Life can be a piece of shit but I gg to use it as fertilizer, to cultivate it (life) to be sweet fruit , that is, wiser with wisdom as u grow. Then, your life is fruitful n meaningful. Hope u get my insight.

Hope all single mum stay strong, positive for both mental n physical Heath n our child will view us as hero n be a model of resilient in their life, no matter how tough life can be.

Best regards.
 
Ladies.. nobody want a broken family however shud it happen, dun be dismay or desperate for there's brighter light & better future at the end of it .. its not the end if our hubby desert us ... be brave n be strong n protect the kids.
Stay focus n stay strong.. God bless
 
I m a single mum of 3 kids. I been divorced for 3 yrs. sometimes, I asked myself if I didn't divorce , what would it be like for my 3 children n myself.

Then again, my ex had an affair with a maid in 2004. I forgave him . But he an another affair in 2014, even plotted to kill me over my insurance, my saving n the house. From then onwards , i move on, I like to advocate to my 3 daughters, we can be independent n we will survive. My ex didn't even give us a single cents of maint ( his annual income 103000 ). There loop hope in our law system where the businessman can maniple their earning it even u employ the most clever lawyer. The judges cannot do anything about it., I hold 2 jobs to support my kids too. Meaning, the law said I earn more money than my ex, no maint for me. So, life not fair n woman charter doesn't help much. ( I witnessed many ugly battles in courts, the judges do empathize us but the law need to be fair . N in our system, no fault with man in adultery, unlike China n US system)

Life can be a piece of shit but I gg to use it as fertilizer, to cultivate it (life) to be sweet fruit , that is, wiser with wisdom as u grow. Then, your life is fruitful n meaningful. Hope u get my insight.

Hope all single mum stay strong, positive for both mental n physical Heath n our child will view us as hero n be a model of resilient in their life, no matter how tough life can be.

Best regards.
 
Hi all. i waiting for my final divorce letter. meanwhile, i wanted to ask beacoz he didnt come back home but we still go out with our son. we sometimes still will msg each other to update how r we. is it normal? becoz we been tgt for 11yrs, but he has an affair. so we divorced.
 
Well, after the money is gone, and when yr kids grew up, they came back to claim their children. Of course, with apology that he regretted his mistake n hope for forgiveness... but his is now old n most importantly, once u forgive he. After few months, he will said he is in some kind of debt... very drama.
 
Life is the choice he or she makes ...her ex made a mistake he will regret the rest of his life ...

Stay strong pepper18
 
Dear mummy's,

Please give me an advice as my husband chase me out and I'm no longer stay at this house for about 8 months. Now I'm back to Spore he not allow me to go back home, see my 2 sons and divorce letter had prepare by lawyer.

He outside have girl friend which I'm been endure for 6 years and that time I work with him for 3 years and no salary. When I need money only he give me $100 or $200.

If I'm back to work I have no money to pay rental and lawyer. Please advise which lawyer good, affordable and can pay by installment. Thanks
 

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