Recent miscarriage support

Hi @LadyP

Hope you did a mini confinement and are feeling better now. It's been 5 weeks since my d&c and my period still has not come yet. 1-2 weeks ago, I had very bad backache for a few days. I read that it's common after a miscarriage. But I wasn't sure if it could be me starting to exercise (run and core routines). Anyway the backaches have stopped almost completely so I'm not so worried now. Just curious, anyone of you had the same backache?
 


Hi,i went for a scan yesterday.gyne said that bb got no heartbeat,the bb is still in me.i have not go for the minor operation yet.still thinking if i should go for 2nd opinion.my bb is 8 weeks in growth,i read through,somw was saying to small to dedect a heartbeat,should i wait for another week to go for a scan again.
 
I waited it out. I read on overseas forum that there r ladies who were in the same situation n they waited. Turned out alright. I wish you good luck that u r the luckier one. But be prepared as well.
 
Okie,Thanks.wish me good luck.i cannot sleep this few nights.very upset and worried.praying for a miracle..hopefully my bb will stay strong.
 
zossamuel said:
Hi,i went for a scan yesterday.gyne said that bb got no heartbeat,the bb is still in me.i have not go for the minor operation yet.still thinking if i should go for 2nd opinion.my bb is 8 weeks in growth,i read through,somw was saying to small to dedect a heartbeat,should i wait for another week to go for a scan again.
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Hi @zossamuel

I thought by week 7, doctor would be able to pick up baby's heartbeat? I heard my baby's heartbeat at week 7. My girlfriend's gynae also told her to come back at week 7 to detect the heartbeat. If there's no heartbeat, means the pregnancy was not a good one.

Anyway, I think it's alright to wait another week... And get a second opinion.

In the meantime try to rest more and don't exert yourself. Take care.
 
Big hugs, babe.. Maybe wait a week plus n scan again. For my previous preg (not this recent one), gynae could not detect heartbeat at 6+ weeks n got the heartbeat detected at next visit ard 9 weeks.
 
I am experiencing 2nd miscarriage now, devastated, lost hope. Don't know how to try again.

Ladies, how did you all recover (emotionally) and try again?
 
june2012 said:
I am experiencing 2nd miscarriage now, devastated, lost hope. Don't know how to try again.

Ladies, how did you all recover (emotionally) and try again?
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Hi june2012,

Pick up a hobby that you like to do, such as reading books; writing articles etc. Also, maybe dig out and throw away all the digital and normal ovulation test kits that you used in the past, and perhaps also the pregnancy test kit. I cleared all these out this evening before dinner; and realized that I have accepted the loss and move on with life.
 
june2012 said:
I am experiencing 2nd miscarriage now, devastated, lost hope. Don't know how to try again.

Ladies, how did you all recover (emotionally) and try again?
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Hi june2012,
Talk to people, like us or your friends / families who can understand what you have been going through. Doing anything that makes you happy like going for a holiday, plant some plants, read books. You are stronger than you think. Jiayou!
 
Sters said:
Hi june2012,
Talk to people, like us or your friends / families who can understand what you have been going through. Doing anything that makes you happy like going for a holiday, plant some plants, read books. You are stronger than you think. Jiayou!
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Hi june2012,

Another one thing to put this sad episode behind you is to stop doing research on the Internet, about what might have caused it. Instead, do something else, such as watch a nice movie and or develop a hobby which you are likely to stick to even if you successfully conceive next time (such as playing crosswords, sudoku or numerical IQ tests etc).
 
tryingtoconceive2014 said:
Hi june2012,

Another one thing to put this sad episode behind you is to stop doing research on the Internet, about what might have caused it. Instead, do something else, such as watch a nice movie and or develop a hobby which you are likely to stick to even if you successfully conceive next time (such as playing crosswords, sudoku or numerical IQ tests etc).
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Totally agree! I almost went crazy googling all the information on the internet that my gynae who is usually v friendly warned me sternly NOT to google anymore. She say it's a negative behavior that will just spiral and get worse.
 
Ya, I google a lot too, everytime feel a sympton, will google but with no answer and another disappointment. My sister said the emotional ride is too much, can lead to depression. So she advise to take it normally.

Sighhh....but it's difficult
 
june2012 said:
Ya, I google a lot too, everytime feel a sympton, will google but with no answer and another disappointment. My sister said the emotional ride is too much, can lead to depression. So she advise to take it normally.

Sighhh....but it's difficult
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Don't do that anymore. Yes it's emotion roller coaster, you must let it out. Follow ur heart. Watch tv play some games. Anything that can distract yourself.

It's difficult we know but time can heal everything. You will be fine before you realize. Meanwhile just try to do what your hearts tell u.
 
After having tried really hard for the past 4 to 5 cycles after 2 miscarriages, i find myself hvg difficulties getting pregnant despite having positive opk n bd frequently during that week. Anybody hv similar situation with me?

Been goin tcm since jan. Hb also started going tcm since a mth ago..aft noticing poor morphology.

Feel really helpless..
 
starz88 said:
After having tried really hard for the past 4 to 5 cycles after 2 miscarriages, i find myself hvg difficulties getting pregnant despite having positive opk n bd frequently during that week. Anybody hv similar situation with me?

Been goin tcm since jan. Hb also started going tcm since a mth ago..aft noticing poor morphology.

Feel really helpless..
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Hi starz88,

Perhaps going off the daily opk testing will be a good idea. Another forum mom also had 2 miscarriages, the latest one in Jan this year, she on the encouragement of another forum to be mom, went to consult recurrent miscarriages professor Professor Choolani, and had a series of test done on her. The cause of the miscarriages were found, and when the Professor gave her the green light to try to conceive naturally again, she just anyhow bd; I think one time she bd outside the fertility timing window. And in fact, that cycle, she only bd twice. And she cannot believe it, when she tested positive on Hpt. She is now 22 weeks pregnant, and seeing both Dr Sheila who will review her blood test results and modify her medications according; and Prof Choolani, who monitors the growth of her baby.
 
tryingtoconceive2014 said:
Hi starz88,

Perhaps going off the daily opk testing will be a good idea. Another forum mom also had 2 miscarriages, the latest one in Jan this year, she on the encouragement of another forum to be mom, went to consult recurrent miscarriages professor Professor Choolani, and had a series of test done on her. The cause of the miscarriages were found, and when the Professor gave her the green light to try to conceive naturally again, she just anyhow bd; I think one time she bd outside the fertility timing window. And in fact, that cycle, she only bd twice. And she cannot believe it, when she tested positive on Hpt. She is now 22 weeks pregnant, and seeing both Dr Sheila who will review her blood test results and modify her medications according; and Prof Choolani, who monitors the growth of her baby.
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Can u share with me the link of that forum or article for me to read up more?
 
It was very hard for me when i miscarried my first child. Missed miscarriage which had a heartbeat and then no more at 11 weeks. I tried to occupy myself with other things like drinking lots of my favourite tea and eating sashimi, things you are supposed to avoid when pregnant and even went on holiday. Just keep trying ok and when the time is right, you will have that precious child as I did with my baby girl even though it was a high risk pregnancy with lots of bleeding. I'll keep you in my prayers. Hugs
 
Just to share, I had 2 mcs as well back in nov 2011 at 23weeks and oct 2012 at 21weeks for twin in less than 1 year. It was never easy, I knew the feeling to get pregnant again quickly but worry about losing as well. The most important thing is nourish your health back to give the best chance when you conceive again instead of later feeling guilty. It was never easy, you will never forget and always worry. However, for me, I accept Christ, did a lot of things like TCM, exercise, lose weight, wrote 2 books (http://feliciatan22.com/product-category/shop/), wait upon God's timing and had my rainbow baby this year finally...
 
feliciatan22 said:
Just to share, I had 2 mcs as well back in nov 2011 at 23weeks and oct 2012 at 21weeks for twin in less than 1 year. It was never easy, I knew the feeling to get pregnant again quickly but worry about losing as well. The most important thing is nourish your health back to give the best chance when you conceive again instead of later feeling guilty. It was never easy, you will never forget and always worry. However, for me, I accept Christ, did a lot of things like TCM, exercise, lose weight, wrote 2 books (http://feliciatan22.com/product-category/shop/), wait upon God's timing and had my rainbow baby this year finally...
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Hi feliciatan22,

But I thought you went to consult Professor Choolani, and he is against tcm. Or you went to tcm to nourish your body for how long, before you consulted Professor?

Glad that you finally got your rainbow baby this year. Hopefully it will be my turn soon.
 
feliciatan22 said:
Just to share, I had 2 mcs as well back in nov 2011 at 23weeks and oct 2012 at 21weeks for twin in less than 1 year. It was never easy, I knew the feeling to get pregnant again quickly but worry about losing as well. The most important thing is nourish your health back to give the best chance when you conceive again instead of later feeling guilty. It was never easy, you will never forget and always worry. However, for me, I accept Christ, did a lot of things like TCM, exercise, lose weight, wrote 2 books (http://feliciatan22.com/product-category/shop/), wait upon God's timing and had my rainbow baby this year finally...
Click to expand...
Tryingtoconceive2014, i will keep you in my prayers and hope that you get a sticky bean this month! Dont give up hope! If you want to TCM, try ban choon chan at marine parade, i went to see him to bu after my miscarriage.

Feliciatan22, praise God for your rainbow. Thanks for sharing your stories. Many women in Singapore get judged when we miscarry and its great that you have openly shared your loss. I for one was told by some people that I was too skinny or my body was too weak. I respect your courage as I have only been able to tell certain people and not talk about it openly. I will try to take a leaf from your book and share what I've been through.
 
HM82 said:
Tryingtoconceive2014, i will keep you in my prayers and hope that you get a sticky bean this month! Dont give up hope! If you want to TCM, try ban choon chan at marine parade, i went to see him to bu after my miscarriage.

Feliciatan22, praise God for your rainbow. Thanks for sharing your stories. Many women in Singapore get judged when we miscarry and its great that you have openly shared your loss. I for one was told by some people that I was too skinny or my body was too weak. I respect your courage as I have only been able to tell certain people and not talk about it openly. I will try to take a leaf from your book and share what I've been through.
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Hi HM82,

I tried the tcm you mentioned after I suffered from a blighted ovum in August last year. Got BFP in April this year, but suffered subchrionic bleeding at week 6 (baby subsequently no more growth and h/b in 2 weeks), that time I called the Old uncle Chan to request to an tai (stabilize my pregnancy). Somehow, he was very hot tempered the morning I called. He just commented that baby grows or not decided by my gynae, and not him, and so refused to an tai for me.

Then I was referred by my gynae Dr Loh to see Prof Choolani, as this is my 6th m/c. Prof when we saw him for results reviews warned that now I am under him, unless the doctors are referred by him (such as endocrine Dr Alvin Ng his friend, he said all my tests regarding adrenal glands came back normal, don't need to do anything at this stage; and rheumatologist Dr Sheila for my immune system issues, do not see any other Dr, including Chinese Dr anymore; as otherwise if something fallen through the cracks along the line, he can refuse to treat me further. I need to see him anyway as a high risk patient for my next pregnancy, so I did not risk going back to tcm anymore.

I then tiao for 3 months with another sinseh at North Bridge Road Tai Choon Foh Dr Liew Wei Meow, he gave me herbs to strengthen my uterus. Can try again this cycle according to Professor. So I am just letting nature take its course, and leave everything to God.
 
HM82 said:
Tryingtoconceive2014, i will keep you in my prayers and hope that you get a sticky bean this month! Dont give up hope! If you want to TCM, try ban choon chan at marine parade, i went to see him to bu after my miscarriage.

Feliciatan22, praise God for your rainbow. Thanks for sharing your stories. Many women in Singapore get judged when we miscarry and its great that you have openly shared your loss. I for one was told by some people that I was too skinny or my body was too weak. I respect your courage as I have only been able to tell certain people and not talk about it openly. I will try to take a leaf from your book and share what I've been through.
Click to expand...

Everyone likes to comment about things without knowing the facts or about you. For my case, I started writing the first book for my own personal memory, only to realise many had mc and grief silently so the book provided some form of comfort for them to know that they are not alone. Likewise, some chose to contact me as well after reading it to share their own stories and journeys. Just know that we are doing our best is good enough, as for sharing with others, do it only if you are comfortable, even for my case I take some time to "admit" the fact that I am an author but of such topic… Never easy too…
 
tryingtoconceive2014 said:
Hi feliciatan22,

But I thought you went to consult Professor Choolani, and he is against tcm. Or you went to tcm to nourish your body for how long, before you consulted Professor?

Glad that you finally got your rainbow baby this year. Hopefully it will be my turn soon.
Click to expand...

I am not so sure about Prof being against TCM? Anyway, I nourish for about 6 months after my mc.. All this while, I had been consulting him as well for all the necessary checks to do.. before trying to conceive again.
 
Tryingtoconceive2014, sorry to hear about your bad experience with uncle chan. He is a grumpy man but has a good heart. Unfortunately, he has also told me before that whether the baby has a heartbeat or not is not within his control so he will only prescribe an tai upon conception but there's nothing he can do if the baby is not healthy. I wish you all the best in your ttc and pray that you'll have a sticky bean this time!
 
I am sorry for your loss and my condolence to you. It was never easy to open up and share the story, this can be the joy for you. Joy as in, you have put down this sadness of yours and holding that hope to carry your life ahead. Have more protein and healthier food choice, before you try another round. I believe that the next time you try, your baby will be as tough and strong as you. Your prayer will be heard. Stay positive and strong because your still have a long way to go!
 
chengsl said:
I am sorry for your loss and my condolence to you. It was never easy to open up and share the story, this can be the joy for you. Joy as in, you have put down this sadness of yours and holding that hope to carry your life ahead. Have more protein and healthier food choice, before you try another round. I believe that the next time you try, your baby will be as tough and strong as you. Your prayer will be heard. Stay positive and strong because your still have a long way to go!
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Hi chengsl,

Thanks for your encouragement. :)
 
HM82 said:
Tryingtoconceive2014, sorry to hear about your bad experience with uncle chan. He is a grumpy man but has a good heart. Unfortunately, he has also told me before that whether the baby has a heartbeat or not is not within his control so he will only prescribe an tai upon conception but there's nothing he can do if the baby is not healthy. I wish you all the best in your ttc and pray that you'll have a sticky bean this time!
Click to expand...

Hi HM82,

I see. Hopefully I will get a really sticky bean when I am pregnant again. Fighting.
 
feliciatan22 said:
I am not so sure about Prof being against TCM? Anyway, I nourish for about 6 months after my mc.. All this while, I had been consulting him as well for all the necessary checks to do.. before trying to conceive again.
Click to expand...

Hi feliciatan22,

I see. Coz when my hubby checked with Prof during the results review session on September 25 morning, whether he is okay with me continuing to see Chinese dr, his reply is that in his principle, he does not see patients who see more than 1 doctor, unless the doctors are recommended by him; as if something fallen thru the cracks, he will then refuse to treat me further. And since I am under him for my next pregnancy, cannot take any chances, so just stopped seeing tcm that day onwards. The tcm felt a bit helpless when I called and informed him, but again what to do? :p

Just curious. May I know which tcm you went to tiao your body before ttc again?
 
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